Sunday, July 27, 2003
Random thoughts on my top 99 of 1999, part 4.
*
The award for best use of a Diana Ross sample in 1999 (in this case, “Love Hangover”) goes to Jermaine Dupri, of all fucking people, for his superlative production on Monica’s “The First Night.” In which she makes not having sex sound sexier than ever. Her sultry voice does a fine job of making not-so-sexy things sound sexy, akin to hearing Barry White (R.I.P.) say “periodontist.”
*
I understand why Jay-Z and DMX need hoes, but why do they need money and cash?
I just need the track’s marvelous “game over” video game noises.
*
1999 was the year Robbie Williams should have become a massive star in the U.S. as he was (and still is) worldwide, but Americans are, by and large, stupid, and wouldn’t know good taste if it bit ‘em in the ass. Perhaps he’s too cheeky, just a mite too British, for us Yanks (much like Jarvis Cocker); an album title like The Ego Has Landed is certainly too clever for most of us. And it’s our loss, with shoulda-been smashes like “Let Me Entertain You” – really, can you turn down that invitation? If so, you’re a) a lesbian, or b) don’t appreciate appropriately hairy blokes with talent oozing from every pore (and perhaps some orifices – orifi? – too).
*
The Masters at Work career-resuscitation machine was going full bore at the end of the nineties, having already done its work on Roy Ayers and George Benson, with Jody Watley and James Ingram (and Patti Austin!) to come. In the spotlight near year’s end was the divine Stephanie Mills with her MAW-produced and –played and –arranged “Latin Lover.” Mills wrapped her still-sumptuous pipes around the song and squeezed it till it was in need of CPR – and then gave it that, to boot. Meanwhile, Kenny and Louie just did what they do so well: put together deep, creamy house of the highest order. No one does it better.
*
“Betcha Man Can’t (Triz)” is a delicious, slinky groover of a sex song from the ‘Ricans in the house, Fat Joe featuring Big Punisher, Cuban Link and Triple Seis. It’s clever, has got a great beat, and you dance to it; I’d give it an 88.
*
Orgy (where are they now?) were a great idea, only occasionally great in practice, combining goth, industrial, and their mentors Korn’s strand of aggro-rock into a package I thought was destined to appeal to angst-ridden teenagers of most stripes. Apparently, I was mistaken. I never thought their cover of “Blue Monday” was their finest moment, either – too easy, too by-the-numbers. “Stitches,” however, heaved and stewed and kept threatening to boil over with delicious tension like few rock singles in ’99.
*
“Bug A Boo” by Destiny’s Child is fierce as hell, and sexy as fuck.
*
I was in the minority in thinking that as Mariah Carey got further into the hiphop milieu, as it were, with her music, the better it got. [Of course, there was a breaking point - and it came on the Glitter soundtrack, where she was reduced to a guest on her own songs.] Her last great single, then, was her (first) collaboration featuring Jay-Z, “Heartbreaker,” on which she sings all over the track (but, crucially, doesn’t oversing – at least until the very end, when she casually tosses in some of her sounds-only-dogs-can-hear), Jay-Z does his usual $50,000 for 16 bars bit, and most importantly, Mariah sounds relaxed, almost at piece (one can only assume due to her then-recent breakup with then-Sony chief Tommy Mottola). Easy, breezy, beautiful, cover girl.
*
Juvenile’s “Back That Azz Up”: if “Thong Song” weren’t quite so crass and featured Juvi's peculiarly delightful N.O. patois and, of course, Mannie Fresh’s so fresh, so clean production job, complete with perfectly-placed sampled strings - even then, Sisqo's single wouldn't be this good. Or this clever. And lest I forget: there's a "Monie in the Middle" reference!
*
The award for best use of a Diana Ross sample in 1999 (in this case, “Love Hangover”) goes to Jermaine Dupri, of all fucking people, for his superlative production on Monica’s “The First Night.” In which she makes not having sex sound sexier than ever. Her sultry voice does a fine job of making not-so-sexy things sound sexy, akin to hearing Barry White (R.I.P.) say “periodontist.”
*
I understand why Jay-Z and DMX need hoes, but why do they need money and cash?
I just need the track’s marvelous “game over” video game noises.
*
1999 was the year Robbie Williams should have become a massive star in the U.S. as he was (and still is) worldwide, but Americans are, by and large, stupid, and wouldn’t know good taste if it bit ‘em in the ass. Perhaps he’s too cheeky, just a mite too British, for us Yanks (much like Jarvis Cocker); an album title like The Ego Has Landed is certainly too clever for most of us. And it’s our loss, with shoulda-been smashes like “Let Me Entertain You” – really, can you turn down that invitation? If so, you’re a) a lesbian, or b) don’t appreciate appropriately hairy blokes with talent oozing from every pore (and perhaps some orifices – orifi? – too).
*
The Masters at Work career-resuscitation machine was going full bore at the end of the nineties, having already done its work on Roy Ayers and George Benson, with Jody Watley and James Ingram (and Patti Austin!) to come. In the spotlight near year’s end was the divine Stephanie Mills with her MAW-produced and –played and –arranged “Latin Lover.” Mills wrapped her still-sumptuous pipes around the song and squeezed it till it was in need of CPR – and then gave it that, to boot. Meanwhile, Kenny and Louie just did what they do so well: put together deep, creamy house of the highest order. No one does it better.
*
“Betcha Man Can’t (Triz)” is a delicious, slinky groover of a sex song from the ‘Ricans in the house, Fat Joe featuring Big Punisher, Cuban Link and Triple Seis. It’s clever, has got a great beat, and you dance to it; I’d give it an 88.
*
Orgy (where are they now?) were a great idea, only occasionally great in practice, combining goth, industrial, and their mentors Korn’s strand of aggro-rock into a package I thought was destined to appeal to angst-ridden teenagers of most stripes. Apparently, I was mistaken. I never thought their cover of “Blue Monday” was their finest moment, either – too easy, too by-the-numbers. “Stitches,” however, heaved and stewed and kept threatening to boil over with delicious tension like few rock singles in ’99.
*
“Bug A Boo” by Destiny’s Child is fierce as hell, and sexy as fuck.
*
I was in the minority in thinking that as Mariah Carey got further into the hiphop milieu, as it were, with her music, the better it got. [Of course, there was a breaking point - and it came on the Glitter soundtrack, where she was reduced to a guest on her own songs.] Her last great single, then, was her (first) collaboration featuring Jay-Z, “Heartbreaker,” on which she sings all over the track (but, crucially, doesn’t oversing – at least until the very end, when she casually tosses in some of her sounds-only-dogs-can-hear), Jay-Z does his usual $50,000 for 16 bars bit, and most importantly, Mariah sounds relaxed, almost at piece (one can only assume due to her then-recent breakup with then-Sony chief Tommy Mottola). Easy, breezy, beautiful, cover girl.
*
Juvenile’s “Back That Azz Up”: if “Thong Song” weren’t quite so crass and featured Juvi's peculiarly delightful N.O. patois and, of course, Mannie Fresh’s so fresh, so clean production job, complete with perfectly-placed sampled strings - even then, Sisqo's single wouldn't be this good. Or this clever. And lest I forget: there's a "Monie in the Middle" reference!
# posted by Thomas : 6:48 AM
